I read a lot of blogs and websites that are written by former smokers that give advice on how they quit smoking. I encourage every smoker to find a way that works for them but often these reformed smokers are giving bad advice that will cause another smoker to fail or relapse, which just increases the sense of shame that a smoker has that there is something wrong with them that they can't quit, when this method worked for someone else.
Bad advise includes:
1. Keep a pack around to show that you are stronger than your addiction.
Most smokers will have a moment of weakness usually when under stress and will rech for that "emergency pack" and believe that "one" won't hurt. but one will always lead to another one and most smokers underestimate how seductive nicotine can be and they will relapse. Instead of having a pack around, know that a cigarette is only as far away as the closest all night convenience store, however, in a moment of weakness, you must get inyour car and drive to the store. This can give you enough time to realize that "just one" isn't worth the effort.
2. Savor the last cigarette and enjoy every moment since it will be your last.
This will only re-enforce what you are giving up instead of what you are gaining. Smokers often feel they are losing a best friend but what they are really losing is a terrorist that is trying to kill them. Instead of a sense of depravation, the quitter should feel gratitude for escaping from a prison where a cigarette controls the smoker.
3. Taper off of cigarettes, smoking less and less each day until one day you aren't smoking any.
Tapering down doesn't work but only keeps the body in a state of withdrawal for a longer period of time. Smokers become accustom to a certain level of nicotine in their body, when deprived, they will adjust their smoking, either inhaling deeper or smoking more of each cigarette. Many smokers can taper down to the 5 to 7 most important ciagrettes of the day and congratulate themselves for only smoking these few but they find it extremely difficult to give up these last few cigarettes. While following some of my suggestions in other posts, many smokers will naturally cut down but that is not the point of the exercise because sooner or later, every smoker needs to go cold turkey--give up smoking all of their cigarettes, instead of just limiting themselves to a few a day.
4. Drinking water doesn't help.
Nicotine is water soluble and drinking more water will help flush the nicotine out of your system and drinking water mimics the same hand to mouth motion as smoking and tricks your subconscious.
When seeking advise, listen with your heart and see what rings true for you. Judge the advise by what feel right to you. Don't listen to someone just because they are a doctor or have a Masters or PhD. they could be wrong too. finding your own path to quitting can be difficult but not impossible and if you try something that doesn't work for you, don't consider yourself a failure, but view this as a learning experience, you are just one step closer to finding out what does work for you.
A site that encourages smokers to quit and provides tips to friends and family on how to motivate a smoker to quit without nagging, shaming or blaming. Also check out my website with several videos on becoming smoke-free at: www.VJSleight.com and connect with me on LinkedIn at :www.linkedin.com/in/vjsleight .
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Making Smoking a Conscious Choice
Have you ever found a cigarette in your mouth and forgot that you had lite up or had a second one in the ashtray? Smoking becomes an unconscious, automatic habit. Most cigarettes are not conscious choices but a reflex. The brain triggers a want, desire or craving for a cigarette and the smoker automatically reaches for one without consciously thinking about it. The brain reflex continues after an individual decides to quit and these wants, desires or cravings become stronger and build on one another, especially during the first few weeks. Becoming aware of when, where and why you are reaching for a cigarette can help develop a successful plan for quitting. Before you light up, start a log of what time you smoke, what are you doing, and how you are feeling. Many of your triggers you know about, but there are many that you are not aware of and after quitting, it seems that these triggers come from out of the blue but actually it only seems that way since they were unconscious triggers that you just weren't aware of but your brain remembers every trigger. Every want, desire, or craving for a smoke is your brain saying, "I always get my nicotine when this (fill in the blank) happens, so I want my nicotine and I want it now!" By knowing your triggers, you can plan for alternatives for each trigger. Have a whole tool box of different strategies to deal with your different triggers and you are more likely to be successful than having just one strategy that only works with some of your triggers.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Classical Conditioning Can Keep You Smoking
Palov was a scientist that discovered that dogs can be conditioned to salivate when they hear a bell rung because the sound had been paired with the presentation of food. The dogs learned that when they hear the bell, they would be fed. This is called classical conditioning. Habit cigarettes are the very same thing. Everything a smoker smokes a cigarette while doing something else, they can become classically conditioned to think of a cigarette every time they do this other activity because it has become paired with smoking--the next time you hear the phone ring, do you want a cigarette? Even if you just had one? Getting into your car, do you need a cigarette first? Habits can be associated with people, places, situations, times, events, objects, and emotions.
This conditioning happens because nictoine goes to a part of the brain that give extra attention to external events. So when you smoke, you are more aware of what is happening at the same time. if you do the same thing many times while smoking the brain now expects to receive nicotine when you do this activity again, every time.
Smokers often think that these habit cigarettes are the harder to give up but the opposite is true. If you smoke every time you answer the phone and this happens 5 times a day, when you quit, 5 times each day you will "crave" the cigarette, so it seems like you are thinking about cigarettes all the time, but what this means is that you get to practice not having a cigarette 5 times each day also. In a very short period of time, you brain extinguishes the connection between the phone and the cigarette. Pavlov also proved this theory too, it is called extinction.
The urge for habit cigarettes falls away within 2 to 3 weeks. When the conditioning is extinguished, most smokers will feel like a non-smoker and believe that they have beat Kid Nicotine but not all conditioning is extinguished and the smoker needs to be aware of the "out-of-the-blue" craving. Often this is a habit cigarette that is paired to an activity that you don't do very often, maybe only once or twice a year, yet your brain still remembers this connection. You need an emergency plan for when those "out-of-the-blue" craving pop up.
This conditioning happens because nictoine goes to a part of the brain that give extra attention to external events. So when you smoke, you are more aware of what is happening at the same time. if you do the same thing many times while smoking the brain now expects to receive nicotine when you do this activity again, every time.
Smokers often think that these habit cigarettes are the harder to give up but the opposite is true. If you smoke every time you answer the phone and this happens 5 times a day, when you quit, 5 times each day you will "crave" the cigarette, so it seems like you are thinking about cigarettes all the time, but what this means is that you get to practice not having a cigarette 5 times each day also. In a very short period of time, you brain extinguishes the connection between the phone and the cigarette. Pavlov also proved this theory too, it is called extinction.
The urge for habit cigarettes falls away within 2 to 3 weeks. When the conditioning is extinguished, most smokers will feel like a non-smoker and believe that they have beat Kid Nicotine but not all conditioning is extinguished and the smoker needs to be aware of the "out-of-the-blue" craving. Often this is a habit cigarette that is paired to an activity that you don't do very often, maybe only once or twice a year, yet your brain still remembers this connection. You need an emergency plan for when those "out-of-the-blue" craving pop up.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Obnoxious Ex-smokers
Out of 7 siblings, 6 of us smoked. My brother was the first to quit because he was having surgery and was told that he would not heal very well if he continued to smoke, so he quit on the way to the hospital. After his surgery, he nagging the rest of us and was just obnoxious with his holier-than-thou attitude towards those of us who continued to smoke. Years later after I quit, he confessed that he developed that attitude on purpose to keep him quit. He knew that if he ever picked up another cigarette, the other 5 of us would just rag on him to no end. So if an ex-smoker is giving you a hard time, it might just be a defense mechanism.
Most individuals are allergic to smoke and after they quit can develop symptoms when around smoke such as runny and watery eyes, upset stomach, and headache. Secondhand or environmental smoke does affect others, especially children since they systems are still developing. So an ex-smoker may be allergic where they didn't have symptoms when they smoke, as if they were immune before.
For other ex-smokers, they might have been the in-you-face- kind of smoker like Morton Downey Jr. who would call individuals like me "health Nazi's", that is until he developed cancer and quit smoking himself. He had what I call an "Ah -Ha" moment, where a smoker finally gets that it's not about his right to smoke, it's a health issue. They say we spend our youth creating our wealth, then as we age, we spend our wealth trying to regain our youth. Smoking robs a person of their youth, causing wrinkles and damaged skin and will kill 50% of long term smokers and disable a large percentage that it doesn't kill. So the next time an obnoxious ex-smoker gets in your face, just realize that they have finally "got" it--it's about health and longevity and they care for you enough to want to to stop to be around for a long time.
Most individuals are allergic to smoke and after they quit can develop symptoms when around smoke such as runny and watery eyes, upset stomach, and headache. Secondhand or environmental smoke does affect others, especially children since they systems are still developing. So an ex-smoker may be allergic where they didn't have symptoms when they smoke, as if they were immune before.
For other ex-smokers, they might have been the in-you-face- kind of smoker like Morton Downey Jr. who would call individuals like me "health Nazi's", that is until he developed cancer and quit smoking himself. He had what I call an "Ah -Ha" moment, where a smoker finally gets that it's not about his right to smoke, it's a health issue. They say we spend our youth creating our wealth, then as we age, we spend our wealth trying to regain our youth. Smoking robs a person of their youth, causing wrinkles and damaged skin and will kill 50% of long term smokers and disable a large percentage that it doesn't kill. So the next time an obnoxious ex-smoker gets in your face, just realize that they have finally "got" it--it's about health and longevity and they care for you enough to want to to stop to be around for a long time.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Using Cigars to Quit Smoking Cigarettes
Jim quit smoking cigarettes almost two years ago but he has started smoking mini-cigars that are the shape of a cigarette. Many men switch to cigars thinking that this is a safer alternative to smoking cigarettes because "you don't inhale" with cigars. Research has shown that when a cigarette smoker switches to cigars, that they do inhale, it is an automatic response, plus cigars, depending on the size, can have more nicotine than a cigarette, which can making smoking it even worse than sticking with a cigarette.
But it is not a matter whether it is safer or not. The issue is that the need for nicotine or addiction to nicotine is still there. A smoker always gets something from the cigarette that they are not getting somewhere else. The trick is to figure out what it is that the smoker really needs and it's not the cigarette, it is what the cigarette represents.
When a smoker quits, they go through different phases. The first phase is the physical addiction which is very intense for a week and then tapers lasting about 3 to 4 weeks. the next phase is dealing with habit cigarettes which takes a month to reverse a habit. The next phase deals with strong emotions and stress which can last a lifetime. By talking to a smoker and asking what is the longest period of time they have quit smoking for and what happened that caused them to pick up that first cigarette after quitting, I can determine what issues this smoker needs to deal with. If a smoker can't quit for more than a couple of days, then I know they are probably highly physically addicted and their issue is to deal with this. For someone like Jim, mostly likely his return to smoking cigars is to deal with underlying stress or strong emotions.
Finding out what the underlying issues are, and developing a strategy for dealing with the issue is the key for long term success.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Who is in Control, You or the Cigarette?
A few days ago I flew up to Seattle to visit family and friends. My flight was delayed and I spent needless extra hours in an airport. If I had been a smoker, this would have been very uncomfortable. Many participants in my stop smoking workshops have admitted that they avoid flying because of the restrictions on smoking. They can't or don't want to have to deal with the stress of flying and spending hours without getting a hit from Kid Nicotine. For others that must fly, it is to not uncommon for them to use Nicotine Replacement Products such as the patch, the gum or lozenge to get through those times when they absolutely can't smoke. So they instead of using these products to help them quit, they are used to just handle the withdrawals until they can grab a cigarette.
I remember once having a date at a 5 star restaurant. I noticed there was no ashtray on the table and I immediately wanted to leave because I thought I couldn't smoke, (Of course, this was many years ago, many states now ban smoking in restaurants). I would have missed out on a great meal.
These are just a couple of way that cigarettes control our lives instead of us being in control. When new laws are proposed to limit smoking, the smoker automatically thinks that the government is exercising too much control over our lives but isn't it the other way around? The cigarette restricts what we will and will not do, it is exercising the ultimate control but making us think that nicotine is a friend that we can't live without instead it is a cell mate that keeps us in prison. Cigarettes went as far as dictating what size purse I would buy because it had to be big enough for all the normal things women carry in a purse, plus two packs of cigarettes, after all, I didn't want to run out. I lived in fear of not having my cigarettes near.
List all the way that Kid Nicotine is keeping your world a prison and think of the freedom you will have when you knock Kid Nicotine out of your life for good.
I remember once having a date at a 5 star restaurant. I noticed there was no ashtray on the table and I immediately wanted to leave because I thought I couldn't smoke, (Of course, this was many years ago, many states now ban smoking in restaurants). I would have missed out on a great meal.
These are just a couple of way that cigarettes control our lives instead of us being in control. When new laws are proposed to limit smoking, the smoker automatically thinks that the government is exercising too much control over our lives but isn't it the other way around? The cigarette restricts what we will and will not do, it is exercising the ultimate control but making us think that nicotine is a friend that we can't live without instead it is a cell mate that keeps us in prison. Cigarettes went as far as dictating what size purse I would buy because it had to be big enough for all the normal things women carry in a purse, plus two packs of cigarettes, after all, I didn't want to run out. I lived in fear of not having my cigarettes near.
List all the way that Kid Nicotine is keeping your world a prison and think of the freedom you will have when you knock Kid Nicotine out of your life for good.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Dreaming About Smoking Even After Quitting
Yesterday was my 18th anniversary of going smoke free. I gave my first stop smoking workshop one month later. Even after all this time, I still dream that I smoke. It usually happens before a new workshop is scheduled to start and I'm in a panic because I need to quit right now, so that I can facilitate the class. Upon waking, it takes a minute or two to realize it was just a dream and for that minute or two I feel guilty that I have slipped and smoked.
I smoked for over 20 years and it is unrealistic to think that I will never have another thought or dream about smoking but that is all it is just a thought, just a dream (nightmare would be more accurate). all is well. But when we think of smoking, the word that is most often used is--craving. People who have been quit for 5 years will say--"I'm craving a cigarette right now" but what they are really saying is, "I'm thinking about something that I did for a very long time but I don't do that anymore and it's no big deal." Thinking or dreaming about a cigarette is very different than those cravings that hit right after a smoker has stopped smoking, which are physical and mental sensations.
so the next time you think, dream or "crave" a cigarette, just realize that it is just a thought and you can change the way you think about smoking--"It's something I used to do but I've outgrown that and (name what is important to you) is more important to me than having a cigarette.
I smoked for over 20 years and it is unrealistic to think that I will never have another thought or dream about smoking but that is all it is just a thought, just a dream (nightmare would be more accurate). all is well. But when we think of smoking, the word that is most often used is--craving. People who have been quit for 5 years will say--"I'm craving a cigarette right now" but what they are really saying is, "I'm thinking about something that I did for a very long time but I don't do that anymore and it's no big deal." Thinking or dreaming about a cigarette is very different than those cravings that hit right after a smoker has stopped smoking, which are physical and mental sensations.
so the next time you think, dream or "crave" a cigarette, just realize that it is just a thought and you can change the way you think about smoking--"It's something I used to do but I've outgrown that and (name what is important to you) is more important to me than having a cigarette.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Myths About Nicotine Replacement Products
Many smokers believe that medicinal nicotine is just as harmful as getting nicotine from smoking but that is not true. Inhalation is the faster way for nicotine to enter into the brain because the smoke goes from the lungs to the heart and is pumped directly to the brain. It only takes about 7 to 10 seconds for nicotine to reach the brain. Inhalation of smoke give a higher concentration of nicotine with the fastest delivery possible. Medicinal nicotine takes much longer to get to the brain and give no way near the amount of nicotine that you get from smoking.
Another myth is that medicinal nicotine doesn't work. the truth is that most individuals who use nicotine replacement products don't use enough, they under dose themselves so that the withdrawals never do get under control or the quit using it before they should. The Mayo Clinic in their Tobacco Treatment Specialist Program suggest dosing to the level of addition. They will use a combination of the patch and oral nicotine on an as needed basis. The dose of the patch should match the amount of cigarettes smoked. 20 cigarettes = 21 mg patch. 40 cigarettes = 2 21 mg patches. Then they advocate the use of oral nicotine, the lowest dose gum or lozenge on an as needed basis, when a particularly difficult craving arises. Medicinal nicotine can be used with Zyban (bupropion is the genetic label) for those that are extremely addicted and where one product has not been enough to control withdrawal symptoms. Medicinal nicotine should not be used with Chantix (varenicline is the genetic label) because the two products work on the same receptor sites in the brain and would work against each other instead of together.
Another myth is that if you smoke when you have the patch on, you will have a heart attack. This is not true. Smokers are at a higher risk for heart disease and the best thing they can do for their heart is quit smoking but using medicinal nicotine and smoking together may give the smoker a stomachache or a headache because they are getting too much nicotine.
Medicinal nicotine can help a quitter deal with the withdrawal symptoms of quitting while they are learning to deal with all the other connections to their cigarettes such as breaking habit cigarettes, learning new coping strategies for stress and strong emotions. Tapering off medicinal nicotine is not the same as coming off of nicotine that has been inhaled, the amount of medicinal nicotine is not even close to the dosage from smoking and doesn't reach the level for addiction. Besides, nicotine is addictive but it's not the most dangerous drug in smoke.
Using medicinal nicotine can also help with post cessation weight gain.
Another myth is that medicinal nicotine doesn't work. the truth is that most individuals who use nicotine replacement products don't use enough, they under dose themselves so that the withdrawals never do get under control or the quit using it before they should. The Mayo Clinic in their Tobacco Treatment Specialist Program suggest dosing to the level of addition. They will use a combination of the patch and oral nicotine on an as needed basis. The dose of the patch should match the amount of cigarettes smoked. 20 cigarettes = 21 mg patch. 40 cigarettes = 2 21 mg patches. Then they advocate the use of oral nicotine, the lowest dose gum or lozenge on an as needed basis, when a particularly difficult craving arises. Medicinal nicotine can be used with Zyban (bupropion is the genetic label) for those that are extremely addicted and where one product has not been enough to control withdrawal symptoms. Medicinal nicotine should not be used with Chantix (varenicline is the genetic label) because the two products work on the same receptor sites in the brain and would work against each other instead of together.
Another myth is that if you smoke when you have the patch on, you will have a heart attack. This is not true. Smokers are at a higher risk for heart disease and the best thing they can do for their heart is quit smoking but using medicinal nicotine and smoking together may give the smoker a stomachache or a headache because they are getting too much nicotine.
Medicinal nicotine can help a quitter deal with the withdrawal symptoms of quitting while they are learning to deal with all the other connections to their cigarettes such as breaking habit cigarettes, learning new coping strategies for stress and strong emotions. Tapering off medicinal nicotine is not the same as coming off of nicotine that has been inhaled, the amount of medicinal nicotine is not even close to the dosage from smoking and doesn't reach the level for addiction. Besides, nicotine is addictive but it's not the most dangerous drug in smoke.
Using medicinal nicotine can also help with post cessation weight gain.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Planning Ahead to Quit Smoking
The average smoker smokes a pack a day and each of these 20 cigarette represents a different ritual. The first one in the morning might fit in with a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. The one that you light up to start your car. The one you grab to answer the phone. The two that you smoke after getting into a fight with your spouse. the unexpected extra half a pack from partying with smoking friends.
When quitting, some of these cigarettes will just naturally fall away, while others will be more difficult to give up. Have you ever bought a new car and didn't smoke in it to preserve the new car smell? Didn't seem a hardship, did it? so you don't have to quit all 20 cigarettes when you quit, you just have to be prepared for the slippery area where you tell yourself, "I'm just going to have one." Because that one, will lead you back to all the rest.
If you're not ready to quit all of your cigarettes, start by breaking the different associations with your smoking. For the first week, don't smoke in your car, you'll get over it. The next week, don't smoke when using the phone. Each week break one more ritual until you're ready to stop all of them.
After you quit, most situations will be easy but there will be those moments that you haven't prepared for--those "out of the blue" cravings. Have an emergency plan for those times. who can you call that will support you? How can you change the way you think about the situation to feel better about not smoking? What can you do to get out of the slippery situation?
Individuals have told me about going to a party where "everyone" is smoking and they finally gave in and smoked a few.
I ask, "Why didn't you leave the party?"
"I didn't want to be rude."
"If you had a sudden case of diarrhea, would you stay? Or would you excuse yourself and go home?"
You don't have to announce to everyone that you're leaving because of being around the smoke, that would be rude. But a quitter needs to protect themselves from relapsing. So plan ahead for slippery areas and those "out of the blue" cravings. The better prepared you are, the more likely you will be successful.
When quitting, some of these cigarettes will just naturally fall away, while others will be more difficult to give up. Have you ever bought a new car and didn't smoke in it to preserve the new car smell? Didn't seem a hardship, did it? so you don't have to quit all 20 cigarettes when you quit, you just have to be prepared for the slippery area where you tell yourself, "I'm just going to have one." Because that one, will lead you back to all the rest.
If you're not ready to quit all of your cigarettes, start by breaking the different associations with your smoking. For the first week, don't smoke in your car, you'll get over it. The next week, don't smoke when using the phone. Each week break one more ritual until you're ready to stop all of them.
After you quit, most situations will be easy but there will be those moments that you haven't prepared for--those "out of the blue" cravings. Have an emergency plan for those times. who can you call that will support you? How can you change the way you think about the situation to feel better about not smoking? What can you do to get out of the slippery situation?
Individuals have told me about going to a party where "everyone" is smoking and they finally gave in and smoked a few.
I ask, "Why didn't you leave the party?"
"I didn't want to be rude."
"If you had a sudden case of diarrhea, would you stay? Or would you excuse yourself and go home?"
You don't have to announce to everyone that you're leaving because of being around the smoke, that would be rude. But a quitter needs to protect themselves from relapsing. So plan ahead for slippery areas and those "out of the blue" cravings. The better prepared you are, the more likely you will be successful.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Powerful Technique to Stop Smoking
When we exchange our cigarettes for freedom from tobacco, often we feel deprived. I remember it was a few years after I quit and a craving seemed to overwhelm me with the thought, "How dare they take my cigarettes away from me!" I didn't know who "they" were and it only took a minute to realize what a crazy thought this was, but it shows the seductive power that nicotine can have over us. When we quit, it feels like losing a best friend--one that has been there through everything-the first job, the first boyfriend, the breakup, college, unemployment, the wedding, the divorce, through the good times and the bad, cigarettes never talked back, always gave us the comfort we were seeking and only asked for our future health in return.
A powerful technique for letting go is to write a goodbye letter to your cigarettes detailing what they have meant to you, as well as what they are doing to you. Tell them that you are finally able to handle life and all of it's ups and downs without them. Keep this letter and reread it when nicotine is trying to seduce you back into it's unhealthy ways. Send me a copy, I would love to read it.
A powerful technique for letting go is to write a goodbye letter to your cigarettes detailing what they have meant to you, as well as what they are doing to you. Tell them that you are finally able to handle life and all of it's ups and downs without them. Keep this letter and reread it when nicotine is trying to seduce you back into it's unhealthy ways. Send me a copy, I would love to read it.
Friday, August 15, 2008
97 Reasons to Quit Smoking
As if it is hard to think of reasons to quit, this site has some new and usual reasons such as it is an excuse to play computer games, save water by having to wash your clothes less often to rid them of the smell and save trees because they are being cut to make space for tobacco plants, and one of my favorites- broaden your dating options since many non-smokers will not date a smoker. This happened to my brother who had been acquainted with a woman smoker but didn't consider dating her until she quit smoking! For the full article:
http://www.health.com/health/condition-section/0,,20209134,00.html
http://www.health.com/health/condition-section/0,,20209134,00.html
Monday, August 11, 2008
Quit Smoking for Yourself or For Another Person
Jessica finally decided to quit smoking because her son and daughter in law were going to have their first child and told Jessica that she couldn't be around the child and smoke, which meant she didn't get to babysit her first grandchild.
It's important to quit for yourself rather than for someone else and Jessica is at high risk of relapse if her reason for quitting disappears. What if her son and daughter in law decide to move across the country and Jessica isn't able to visit and babysit like she would like to?
When Kathy became engaged, she promised her fiancée she would quit and she did through my Stop Smoking, Stay Quit workshop. I ran into her at the store about five months later and she cried,
“Every day I wake up and say-I miss my cigarettes!” I made a few suggestions but found out later that she started smoking again when her engagement was broken off. She didn’t really want to quit and when her reason (fiancé) disappeared, so did her desire.
Bertha quit smoking because her husband suffered a heart attack and his doctor told her about the harmful effects of second hand smoke for heart patients. After two years, her husband passed away and she started smoking again. She told me that she felt resentment towards her husband the entire time that she was quit and blamed him for taking away her cigarettes.
Being told that you have to quit or quitting for someone else is not the same as wanting to quit. It is important for the smoker to find reasons to quit for themselves instead of feeling forced to do something against their will. Even if the smoker does quit, they could be setting themselves up to relapse down the road.
It's important to quit for yourself rather than for someone else and Jessica is at high risk of relapse if her reason for quitting disappears. What if her son and daughter in law decide to move across the country and Jessica isn't able to visit and babysit like she would like to?
When Kathy became engaged, she promised her fiancée she would quit and she did through my Stop Smoking, Stay Quit workshop. I ran into her at the store about five months later and she cried,
“Every day I wake up and say-I miss my cigarettes!” I made a few suggestions but found out later that she started smoking again when her engagement was broken off. She didn’t really want to quit and when her reason (fiancé) disappeared, so did her desire.
Bertha quit smoking because her husband suffered a heart attack and his doctor told her about the harmful effects of second hand smoke for heart patients. After two years, her husband passed away and she started smoking again. She told me that she felt resentment towards her husband the entire time that she was quit and blamed him for taking away her cigarettes.
Being told that you have to quit or quitting for someone else is not the same as wanting to quit. It is important for the smoker to find reasons to quit for themselves instead of feeling forced to do something against their will. Even if the smoker does quit, they could be setting themselves up to relapse down the road.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Parental Influence on Adolescent Smoking
Condensed version: Most smokers start as a teenagers and if they become addicted, they become lifelong smokers and have a high risk of dying from smoking. The teen doesn't become addicted with the first cigarette but follows a path that can lead to addiction. The first step is thinking about trying a cigarette, then experimentation, a cigarette every now and then, which progresses to a regular pattern of usage, whether one every day after school, one every Saturday or one every time with a friend that smokes. Once this pattern is set, addiction is already being conditioned for structural brain changes that lead to addiction. Parents can influence whether their child will progress from one step to the next, those teens who are at greatest risk of continuing to smoke have parents that are uninvolved with the teens life, have friends or older siblings that smoke. Unfortunately a large number of teens that smoke are at risk for mental disorders such as depression, conduct disorder, ADHD, schizophrenia and future substance abuse.
For the full text reading:
Parental Influence on Adolescent Smoking
Smoking is one of the most preventable causes of death in the United States. Every day approximately 6000 adolescents will try smoking a cigarette for the first time, half will become a habitual smoker as an adult (U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 2000; cited in Abroms, Haynie 2004). Over one quarter will die from the effects of their habitual smoking. (Orleans & Slade, 1993). Almost ninety percent of adult smokers started before they reached the age of 18, with 30% (Flay 1993) to 71% (U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 2000) being habitual smokers before they were legally able to purchase cigarettes. The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, (2000) estimates that only 7% of adult smokers who try to quit are still smoke free after one year.
It would be unethical to conduct experiments with adolescents and nicotine to assess exactly how long it takes to become addicted to nicotine after the adolescent is exposed to nicotine for the first time or exactly the changes that smoking has on the developing brain of a adolescent, however it is clear that adolescents do smoke and a large percentage will become addicted and this will decrease their life expectancy. This is the reason why it is important to look at adolescent smoking to develop strategies to prevent youth from becoming a smoker in the first place and to develop effective intervention techniques to stop the escalation into habitual adult smoking. Understanding who will quit as an adolescent and who will become an adult smoker is also important in developing these prevention and intervention strategies.
There are many reasons why an adolescent may start smoking such as peer pressure and marketing techniques of the tobacco industry. The purpose of this paper is to present a limited number of peer reviewed articles that discuss the influence of parents on adolescent smoking.
Differences have been identified as to how an adolescent relates to cigarettes and stages have been identified as to the progression of smoking which is called a tobacco trajectory.A tobacco trajectory is identified as the several stages or sequences of events that lead to the adoption of smoking by adolescents (cited in Flay, 1993, Avenevili & Merikangas, 2003): Preparatory, initiation, experimentation, regular use and nicotine dependence.The preparation stage happens when an adolescent or child begins to think about cigarettes and what meaning the cigarettes have for this child. Influences can be marketing by the tobacco companies, information about the health effects and the smoking status of parents, peers and siblings.The first one or two attempts at smoking are the initiation stage. Often there are unfavorable physical sensations such as coughing and dizziness. The next stage is experimentation, which can last for many years. It is the use of tobacco on an irregular basis. Maybe a few times a month or only with certain peers but no regular habit has been established.Regular use is the repeated use of tobacco on a regular basis whether by day, week, on weekends or just after school but with a predictable pattern.
It is important to study if parental influence is different at these different stages and to determine what truly is effective.Avenevoli & Merikangas (2003) did a literature search of published studies to see if whether parents who smoked had an influence on whether their children would smoke. They reviewed articles written after 1980 and which were mainly written in the United States. The age range was from six years old to college age, and were mainly school-based studies with predominately Caucasian subjects.The results they received are inconsistent as to whether the smoking status of a parent influences their adolescent. Several reasons were cited such as lack of standardized definitions, and the absence of adolescent that are not in school. Adolescents who drop out of school may have a higher smoking rate than those who complete high school. They did find that parents of European and Asian decent who smoke, may have an effect of their children. Significant findings were found with mothers who smoked a pack a day of cigarettes, influencing their daughters especially. More consistently they found that having an older brother or sister who smoked was predictive of both current and lifetime smoking. Having friends who smoked was an even greater predictive factor across all stages of the smoking trajectory than either having parents who smoked or older siblings whereas parental smoking was predictive in the regular use stage.
A genetic influence from twin studies (cited in Avenevoli, 2003) may lead to nicotine addiction but was not predictive for initiation.Many of the studies that Avenevoli et al (2003) reviewed did not use the stages of the tobacco trajectory so it is not known whether the effect of parental smoking may be different at different stages or whether the adult had been a former smoker or a current smoker. However, Adalbjarnardottir & Hafsteinsson (2001) did find that parental smoking was predictive of whether an adolescent became a daily smoker.Adalbjarnardottir etal (2001) looked at four different parenting styles and their influence on adolescent smoking. The four styles studied were authoritative, authoritarian, indulgent and neglectful. Theirs was a longitudinal study of 347 adolescents that they followed from age 14 to 17 in Iceland. Their results showed that adolescents whose parents were authoritative, authoritarian or indulgent were less likely to experiment with smoking at age 14 than adolescents who parents were labeled neglectful. By age 17 though, the influence on parenting styles had no effect on whether the adolescent was a daily smoker. They did exclude the daily smokers at age 14 from this progression. With cultural and attitudinal differences between the United States and Iceland it may be difficult to generalize from this study.Miller & Volk (2002) also found significant predictors among parenting styles. They used data from the National Youth Survey, which was a national longitudinal study over seven years with adolescents aged 11 to 17 with the initial information from 1976 with four subsequent follow ups. Miller et al (2202) did find that family relations were more predictive of daily use than for either the earlier stages of initiation or experimentation. Unlike Adalbjarnardottir, Miller et al (2002) did not find any significant findings when looking at how a parent disciplined their child nor their level of honesty.
The activities that Miller et al (2002) found predictive of daily smoking by the age of seventeen were: “Negative labeling of the child by the parent, perceived lack of value towards parental relationship, perceived importance of family activities, lack of time spent with one’s family, average number of weekday evenings spent with the parent and frequency of participation in family activities in the last year”. They also found that having an older sibling who smoked increased the chance of becoming a daily smoker and there was more experimentation with smoking. Miller et al (2002) also concluded that positive family relationships may reduce the risk that the adolescent becomes a daily smoker even if they have passed initiation and experimentation on the tobacco trajectory. However, the data for Miller’s study are from the late 1970’s through mid 1980. Social norm changes towards smoking and current laws against smoking may render these data outdated.In a more recent study, Simons-Miller, Chen, Abroms & Haynie (2004) also concluded that parental relations continue to influence both directly and indirectly whether an adolescent moves along the tobacco trajectory to become a daily smoker.Simon-Miller et al (2004) used data from 1996 from 1320 students in one Maryland school district with racial break down of 66% Caucasian, 25% black and 9% other for subjects. The aspects they studied were peer affiliation, parental influences and smoking stage progression. (Simons-Morton et al, 2004).They found that parental involvement, monitoring and expectations decreased the chance of child progressing forward on the tobacco trajectory but that these traits needed to be sustained over a period of time and not just exhibited at the initiation stage to be protective. They also found that parental influence had an indirect effect in protection against stage progression.
Simons-Morton et al (2004) found that adolescents that start out higher on the tobacco trajectory at earlier ages, tend to have more friends who smoke and the number increases over time. Adolescents who smoke are more likely to want to associate with other adolescents who smoke. Parents who place limits on the friendships formed with these new adolescent friends that smoke indirectly influence their adolescent’s progression . This may be limited to early adolescence since at this age many do not smoke and as the adolescent ages exposure to others who do smoke either on a regular basis or through experimentation increases. Stanton, Flay, Colder and Meta (2004) hypothesized that the escalation of smoking along the tobacco trajectory may be different than just at the initiation stage. They identified six stages: early rapid escalators, late rapid escalators, late moderate escalators, late slow escalators-smokers, stable puffers, and late slow escalators-puffers. The different stages depending on the age the adolescent started smoking and if the smoking increased quickly or over a longer period of time.The data used was from a longitudinal study from the Dunedin Multidisciplinary Health and Development Study in New Zealand. The subjects were interviewed at ages 9, 11, 13, 15, and 18 for a total of 306 subjects with 96% being Caucasian.Early predictors of future smoking at ages 11-13 included attention deficit and conduct disorders. At age 15, behavioral problems, depression scores and change of address were predictors. By age 18, poor school performance, not belonging to organized clubs and attachment to friends were predictors of smoking behavior. Intention to smoke or preparatory stage was indicated for future puffers at age 9 but not leading into rapid escalation of smoking behavior. However, the mother’s psychological symptoms when the child was 9, were an early predictor of smoking behavior. However, all of the factors mentioned may not be related to smoking specifically but may be indicative of underlying problems in the family unit.
The purpose of this paper was to investigate whether parents have an influence on whether their adolescent smokes or not. Although some parental factors do influence their adolescent no pattern was observed and it is not apparent which factors have the greatest influence.It is evident that there are inherent problems with studies in this area, due to lack of standardized definitions and inability to conduct double blind studies due to ethical reasons. Even the studies mentioned suffered from attrition of subjects, which may under estimate actual smoking rates and behaviors because most data are collected from schools. This eliminates those adolescents who do not attend school or who were absent when the initial testing was done. Adolescents who have dropped out of school, have frequent address changes or absenteeism may have higher smoking rates than students that are able to be followed for longitudinal studies. It may be that students who are stable enough to be followed, may have a more stable family life also which may influence smoking behavior.Further studies could be structured to show gender, racial and social-economic differences. Of further interest is the reason why smoking mothers influence their daughters but not their sons (Avenevoli et al 2003).Another avenue for research could look at these different factors along with social norm changes that have happened with smoking over the past decade and whether these changes affect adolescent smoking. Another area could be whether a parent has been a never-smoker or a ex-smoker or a current smoker struggling to quit, how this may influence the preparatory stage.This area of study is important in understanding how an adolescent moves from one stage of the tobacco trajectory to the next and what influences the progression and how parental influences changes with the different stages. This can lead to better prevention and intervention techniques, which over a life time will reduce the death toll from smoking.
References:
Adalbjarnardottir, S. & Hafsteinsson, L. G. (2001). Adolescents’ Perceived Parenting Styles and Their Substance Use: Concurrent and Longitudinal Analyses. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 11 (4), 401-423.Avenevoli, S. & Merikangas, K. R. (2003). Familial Influences on Adolescent Smoking. Addiction, 98 (Suppl 1), 1-20.Flay, B. R. (1993). Youth Tobacco Use: Risks, Patterns, and Control. In C. T. Orleans & J. Slade (Eds.), Nicotine Addiction, Principles and Management, (pp 365 – 384). New York: Oxford University Press.Miller, T. Q. & Volk, R. J. (2002). Family Relationships and Adolescent Cigarette Smoking: Results form a National Longitudinal Survey. Journal of Drug Issues 0022-0426/02/03, 945-972.Simons-Morton, B., Chen, R., Abroms, L. & Hanyie, D. L. (2004) Latent Growth Curve Analyses of Peer and Parent Influences on Smoking Progression Among Early Adolescents. Health Psychology, 23 (6), 612-621.Stanton, W. R. Flay, B. R., Colder, C. R. & Mahta, P. (2004). Identifying and Predicting Adolesecent Smokers’ developmental trajectories. Nicotine & Tobacco Research 6 (5), 843-852.U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (2000). Clinical Practice Guideline: Treating Tobacco Use and Dependence. Public Health Service.
For the full text reading:
Parental Influence on Adolescent Smoking
Smoking is one of the most preventable causes of death in the United States. Every day approximately 6000 adolescents will try smoking a cigarette for the first time, half will become a habitual smoker as an adult (U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 2000; cited in Abroms, Haynie 2004). Over one quarter will die from the effects of their habitual smoking. (Orleans & Slade, 1993). Almost ninety percent of adult smokers started before they reached the age of 18, with 30% (Flay 1993) to 71% (U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 2000) being habitual smokers before they were legally able to purchase cigarettes. The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, (2000) estimates that only 7% of adult smokers who try to quit are still smoke free after one year.
It would be unethical to conduct experiments with adolescents and nicotine to assess exactly how long it takes to become addicted to nicotine after the adolescent is exposed to nicotine for the first time or exactly the changes that smoking has on the developing brain of a adolescent, however it is clear that adolescents do smoke and a large percentage will become addicted and this will decrease their life expectancy. This is the reason why it is important to look at adolescent smoking to develop strategies to prevent youth from becoming a smoker in the first place and to develop effective intervention techniques to stop the escalation into habitual adult smoking. Understanding who will quit as an adolescent and who will become an adult smoker is also important in developing these prevention and intervention strategies.
There are many reasons why an adolescent may start smoking such as peer pressure and marketing techniques of the tobacco industry. The purpose of this paper is to present a limited number of peer reviewed articles that discuss the influence of parents on adolescent smoking.
Differences have been identified as to how an adolescent relates to cigarettes and stages have been identified as to the progression of smoking which is called a tobacco trajectory.A tobacco trajectory is identified as the several stages or sequences of events that lead to the adoption of smoking by adolescents (cited in Flay, 1993, Avenevili & Merikangas, 2003): Preparatory, initiation, experimentation, regular use and nicotine dependence.The preparation stage happens when an adolescent or child begins to think about cigarettes and what meaning the cigarettes have for this child. Influences can be marketing by the tobacco companies, information about the health effects and the smoking status of parents, peers and siblings.The first one or two attempts at smoking are the initiation stage. Often there are unfavorable physical sensations such as coughing and dizziness. The next stage is experimentation, which can last for many years. It is the use of tobacco on an irregular basis. Maybe a few times a month or only with certain peers but no regular habit has been established.Regular use is the repeated use of tobacco on a regular basis whether by day, week, on weekends or just after school but with a predictable pattern.
It is important to study if parental influence is different at these different stages and to determine what truly is effective.Avenevoli & Merikangas (2003) did a literature search of published studies to see if whether parents who smoked had an influence on whether their children would smoke. They reviewed articles written after 1980 and which were mainly written in the United States. The age range was from six years old to college age, and were mainly school-based studies with predominately Caucasian subjects.The results they received are inconsistent as to whether the smoking status of a parent influences their adolescent. Several reasons were cited such as lack of standardized definitions, and the absence of adolescent that are not in school. Adolescents who drop out of school may have a higher smoking rate than those who complete high school. They did find that parents of European and Asian decent who smoke, may have an effect of their children. Significant findings were found with mothers who smoked a pack a day of cigarettes, influencing their daughters especially. More consistently they found that having an older brother or sister who smoked was predictive of both current and lifetime smoking. Having friends who smoked was an even greater predictive factor across all stages of the smoking trajectory than either having parents who smoked or older siblings whereas parental smoking was predictive in the regular use stage.
A genetic influence from twin studies (cited in Avenevoli, 2003) may lead to nicotine addiction but was not predictive for initiation.Many of the studies that Avenevoli et al (2003) reviewed did not use the stages of the tobacco trajectory so it is not known whether the effect of parental smoking may be different at different stages or whether the adult had been a former smoker or a current smoker. However, Adalbjarnardottir & Hafsteinsson (2001) did find that parental smoking was predictive of whether an adolescent became a daily smoker.Adalbjarnardottir etal (2001) looked at four different parenting styles and their influence on adolescent smoking. The four styles studied were authoritative, authoritarian, indulgent and neglectful. Theirs was a longitudinal study of 347 adolescents that they followed from age 14 to 17 in Iceland. Their results showed that adolescents whose parents were authoritative, authoritarian or indulgent were less likely to experiment with smoking at age 14 than adolescents who parents were labeled neglectful. By age 17 though, the influence on parenting styles had no effect on whether the adolescent was a daily smoker. They did exclude the daily smokers at age 14 from this progression. With cultural and attitudinal differences between the United States and Iceland it may be difficult to generalize from this study.Miller & Volk (2002) also found significant predictors among parenting styles. They used data from the National Youth Survey, which was a national longitudinal study over seven years with adolescents aged 11 to 17 with the initial information from 1976 with four subsequent follow ups. Miller et al (2202) did find that family relations were more predictive of daily use than for either the earlier stages of initiation or experimentation. Unlike Adalbjarnardottir, Miller et al (2002) did not find any significant findings when looking at how a parent disciplined their child nor their level of honesty.
The activities that Miller et al (2002) found predictive of daily smoking by the age of seventeen were: “Negative labeling of the child by the parent, perceived lack of value towards parental relationship, perceived importance of family activities, lack of time spent with one’s family, average number of weekday evenings spent with the parent and frequency of participation in family activities in the last year”. They also found that having an older sibling who smoked increased the chance of becoming a daily smoker and there was more experimentation with smoking. Miller et al (2002) also concluded that positive family relationships may reduce the risk that the adolescent becomes a daily smoker even if they have passed initiation and experimentation on the tobacco trajectory. However, the data for Miller’s study are from the late 1970’s through mid 1980. Social norm changes towards smoking and current laws against smoking may render these data outdated.In a more recent study, Simons-Miller, Chen, Abroms & Haynie (2004) also concluded that parental relations continue to influence both directly and indirectly whether an adolescent moves along the tobacco trajectory to become a daily smoker.Simon-Miller et al (2004) used data from 1996 from 1320 students in one Maryland school district with racial break down of 66% Caucasian, 25% black and 9% other for subjects. The aspects they studied were peer affiliation, parental influences and smoking stage progression. (Simons-Morton et al, 2004).They found that parental involvement, monitoring and expectations decreased the chance of child progressing forward on the tobacco trajectory but that these traits needed to be sustained over a period of time and not just exhibited at the initiation stage to be protective. They also found that parental influence had an indirect effect in protection against stage progression.
Simons-Morton et al (2004) found that adolescents that start out higher on the tobacco trajectory at earlier ages, tend to have more friends who smoke and the number increases over time. Adolescents who smoke are more likely to want to associate with other adolescents who smoke. Parents who place limits on the friendships formed with these new adolescent friends that smoke indirectly influence their adolescent’s progression . This may be limited to early adolescence since at this age many do not smoke and as the adolescent ages exposure to others who do smoke either on a regular basis or through experimentation increases. Stanton, Flay, Colder and Meta (2004) hypothesized that the escalation of smoking along the tobacco trajectory may be different than just at the initiation stage. They identified six stages: early rapid escalators, late rapid escalators, late moderate escalators, late slow escalators-smokers, stable puffers, and late slow escalators-puffers. The different stages depending on the age the adolescent started smoking and if the smoking increased quickly or over a longer period of time.The data used was from a longitudinal study from the Dunedin Multidisciplinary Health and Development Study in New Zealand. The subjects were interviewed at ages 9, 11, 13, 15, and 18 for a total of 306 subjects with 96% being Caucasian.Early predictors of future smoking at ages 11-13 included attention deficit and conduct disorders. At age 15, behavioral problems, depression scores and change of address were predictors. By age 18, poor school performance, not belonging to organized clubs and attachment to friends were predictors of smoking behavior. Intention to smoke or preparatory stage was indicated for future puffers at age 9 but not leading into rapid escalation of smoking behavior. However, the mother’s psychological symptoms when the child was 9, were an early predictor of smoking behavior. However, all of the factors mentioned may not be related to smoking specifically but may be indicative of underlying problems in the family unit.
The purpose of this paper was to investigate whether parents have an influence on whether their adolescent smokes or not. Although some parental factors do influence their adolescent no pattern was observed and it is not apparent which factors have the greatest influence.It is evident that there are inherent problems with studies in this area, due to lack of standardized definitions and inability to conduct double blind studies due to ethical reasons. Even the studies mentioned suffered from attrition of subjects, which may under estimate actual smoking rates and behaviors because most data are collected from schools. This eliminates those adolescents who do not attend school or who were absent when the initial testing was done. Adolescents who have dropped out of school, have frequent address changes or absenteeism may have higher smoking rates than students that are able to be followed for longitudinal studies. It may be that students who are stable enough to be followed, may have a more stable family life also which may influence smoking behavior.Further studies could be structured to show gender, racial and social-economic differences. Of further interest is the reason why smoking mothers influence their daughters but not their sons (Avenevoli et al 2003).Another avenue for research could look at these different factors along with social norm changes that have happened with smoking over the past decade and whether these changes affect adolescent smoking. Another area could be whether a parent has been a never-smoker or a ex-smoker or a current smoker struggling to quit, how this may influence the preparatory stage.This area of study is important in understanding how an adolescent moves from one stage of the tobacco trajectory to the next and what influences the progression and how parental influences changes with the different stages. This can lead to better prevention and intervention techniques, which over a life time will reduce the death toll from smoking.
References:
Adalbjarnardottir, S. & Hafsteinsson, L. G. (2001). Adolescents’ Perceived Parenting Styles and Their Substance Use: Concurrent and Longitudinal Analyses. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 11 (4), 401-423.Avenevoli, S. & Merikangas, K. R. (2003). Familial Influences on Adolescent Smoking. Addiction, 98 (Suppl 1), 1-20.Flay, B. R. (1993). Youth Tobacco Use: Risks, Patterns, and Control. In C. T. Orleans & J. Slade (Eds.), Nicotine Addiction, Principles and Management, (pp 365 – 384). New York: Oxford University Press.Miller, T. Q. & Volk, R. J. (2002). Family Relationships and Adolescent Cigarette Smoking: Results form a National Longitudinal Survey. Journal of Drug Issues 0022-0426/02/03, 945-972.Simons-Morton, B., Chen, R., Abroms, L. & Hanyie, D. L. (2004) Latent Growth Curve Analyses of Peer and Parent Influences on Smoking Progression Among Early Adolescents. Health Psychology, 23 (6), 612-621.Stanton, W. R. Flay, B. R., Colder, C. R. & Mahta, P. (2004). Identifying and Predicting Adolesecent Smokers’ developmental trajectories. Nicotine & Tobacco Research 6 (5), 843-852.U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (2000). Clinical Practice Guideline: Treating Tobacco Use and Dependence. Public Health Service.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Who Will Be Successful At Stop Smoking?
It was the last night of my 6 week smoking cessation workshop and we were talking about slipping and falling into relapse. One of the members had slipped because she got stuck in traffic and had an "emergency" cigarette in her car. I had said the week before that by having that "safety" cigarette handy, this person was very likely to smoke it when faced with stress. Another participant mentioned that I had been right and did I know who would relapse within this group. While I never know for sure, I've been doing this long enough to know who is likely to slip and where the slippery areas are that they may be blind to. So I went around the group. For this one participant- it was social situations with family and friends--he then told us that he was going on a family vacation in a couple weeks and was worried about enjoying it without his cigarettes. For another--it was concern about gaining weight.The one I was most worried about relapsing was a woman in her 70's who didn't seem to have a strong desire to quit. She was in fairly good health for having smoked so long and I thought that she had an underlying belief that even though smoking had killed many in her family that she could get away with it. However, my thoughts changed when she told us that she had just attended the funeral of a friend that had died from emphysema. The decreased woman had never smoked but got it from being around secondhand smoke. These two women used to go to the casino and play bingo together. Now this participant had a new motivation because it pained her deeply to think that she might have contributed to her friend's death by smoking around her. I think as long as this motivation stay strong within her, she will be successful or she will become a closet smoker and stop smoking around other people.
Some cigarettes are easy to give up and other are more difficult and some craving just come out of the blue. but you only have to give up "one" cigarette. Make the commitment that you are willing to do whatever it takes to avoid having "just" one, because that is the only one you have to avoid and you will be successful.
Some cigarettes are easy to give up and other are more difficult and some craving just come out of the blue. but you only have to give up "one" cigarette. Make the commitment that you are willing to do whatever it takes to avoid having "just" one, because that is the only one you have to avoid and you will be successful.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Appreciation for Quitting Smoking
I have been helping smokers become smoke free since 1990 and I love receiving letters like the following. It makes it all worth while:
Dear V.J.,
Just needed to drop you a note and thank you for your support and guidance to help me stop smoking. I am "smoke free" since June 8, 2002. Sometimes I still here your voice in my head saying "Remember, you are only a puff away from a pack a day" so I have not even had a single puff since June 7, 2002. Thank you so much for taking my calls early in the morning when I wanted to smoke so badly and giving me tips on how I could get through that moment. Of course chewing on ice chips and baby carrots helped too.
I am grateful for the freedom not smoking has giving me! I no longer have to find the lighter, the pack of smokes and especially a place where it is legal to smoke! I took your advise and started saving the money I would have been spending on cigarettes. Thanks to those savings and not smoking I was able to realize a lifelong dream of flying to Hawaii (I was born there). I had never been able to go before because the thought of not being able to smoke for that long kept me a prisoner. Then I continued to save and my youngest son is going to college on thos savings! what a trip huh? (by the way my sons don't smoke either!)
Again, V.J. thank you for your dedication, your knowledge and you support of me. By the way, if you ever hear that old myth that alcoholics and addicts can't stop smoking, you can tell them for that is simply not true! I am both and they said it would not be possible for me to quit and not drink or use. And yes, stopping smoking was very, very difficult for me yet, one day at a time and with the help of you and your program I remain '"smoke free" for 2252 days (and counting )
See ya at the next Walk for Life. I'll be there in gratitude of being smoke free!
Sincerely,
Dani Melton
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Changing the Way You Think to Help Stop Smoking
It is important to change the way you think about cigarettes. I find it sad when individuals have quit for many years but are still thinking and wanting a cigarette. wouldn't it be nice for smoking to just be a non issue in your life!
The following five steps will help you work through your compulsion to smoke, not only during withdrawals but any time in the future. When a craving comes over you, begin your thinking with what is happening to you
1. Right now I am having a desire to smoke.
When the desire comes up, face it. It is going to come over you whether you like it or not. It is unrealistic that after smoking for so many years that you will never have another thought about a cigarette. The desire is normal. You do not need to be afraid of it, hide from it, get rid of it, or pretend it isn’t there. It is not bigger than you. It cannot hurt you. Let it run its course. Cravings only last for a short while. You can be certain that as long as you do not give into your craving, the desire to smoke will inevitably diminish, becoming less frequent and less intense until most of the time you feel like a non-smoker. Remember that even though you may want a cigarette, you do not want to get sick from smoking or go on smoking for the rest of your life.
2. I can smoke at any time, I am not deprived.
Nobody is taking your cigarettes away from you. You do not have to give up smoking for good. Even if you quit, you can go back to smoking at any time that you choose. However, you can never go back to being a happy smoker again.
3. I am a puff away from a pack a day.
Do not trick yourself into thinking that you can have one puff when the going gets difficult. Using your drug to get through withdrawals from your drug does not make sense. One puff will always call for another puff and sooner or later, you will go back to smoking the same number of cigarettes that you smoked before.
4. Right now I have a choice to make for myself. Either I give in to this temporary discomfort and go back to the constant misery of smoking OR I can accept this temporary discomfort and work through it for these benefits….
Then review your “Reasons for Quitting” wallet card that you have been carrying in your cigarette pack. One way to make sure these are important reasons for stopping is to ask yourself whether you are willing to accept the temporary discomfort of going through withdrawal for your reasons. There are only two choices, so make your choice.
5. At this moment, I willingly accept the temporary discomfort because I want….
Then fill in what it is that you want from quitting. Always end your thinking with at least three major benefits.
When you have a craving, do not let it make a fool of you. Use these thought processes and your reasons card every time that the desire comes up.
Do not whine and complain because you cannot have it both ways. You cannot smoke without consequences. If you do not stop, you will die smoking. There is always a price to pay. You can succumb to your desire to get temporary relief from stress or you can work through it for long term happiness, health and freedom. You must choose between temporary discomfort and ongoing misery.
Use these steps to face your compulsion to smoke and train your mind to work in a new way, instead of automatically giving in to your desire, like Pavlov’s dog.
Breaking your connection to cigarettes takes time and it is easy to become discouraged, so focus on what you are trying to accomplish such as good health, peace of mind, self-respect and freedom from fear and slavery. You are doing something wonderful for yourself and when you succeed, you will be grateful for the rest of your life.
The following five steps will help you work through your compulsion to smoke, not only during withdrawals but any time in the future. When a craving comes over you, begin your thinking with what is happening to you
1. Right now I am having a desire to smoke.
When the desire comes up, face it. It is going to come over you whether you like it or not. It is unrealistic that after smoking for so many years that you will never have another thought about a cigarette. The desire is normal. You do not need to be afraid of it, hide from it, get rid of it, or pretend it isn’t there. It is not bigger than you. It cannot hurt you. Let it run its course. Cravings only last for a short while. You can be certain that as long as you do not give into your craving, the desire to smoke will inevitably diminish, becoming less frequent and less intense until most of the time you feel like a non-smoker. Remember that even though you may want a cigarette, you do not want to get sick from smoking or go on smoking for the rest of your life.
2. I can smoke at any time, I am not deprived.
Nobody is taking your cigarettes away from you. You do not have to give up smoking for good. Even if you quit, you can go back to smoking at any time that you choose. However, you can never go back to being a happy smoker again.
3. I am a puff away from a pack a day.
Do not trick yourself into thinking that you can have one puff when the going gets difficult. Using your drug to get through withdrawals from your drug does not make sense. One puff will always call for another puff and sooner or later, you will go back to smoking the same number of cigarettes that you smoked before.
4. Right now I have a choice to make for myself. Either I give in to this temporary discomfort and go back to the constant misery of smoking OR I can accept this temporary discomfort and work through it for these benefits….
Then review your “Reasons for Quitting” wallet card that you have been carrying in your cigarette pack. One way to make sure these are important reasons for stopping is to ask yourself whether you are willing to accept the temporary discomfort of going through withdrawal for your reasons. There are only two choices, so make your choice.
5. At this moment, I willingly accept the temporary discomfort because I want….
Then fill in what it is that you want from quitting. Always end your thinking with at least three major benefits.
When you have a craving, do not let it make a fool of you. Use these thought processes and your reasons card every time that the desire comes up.
Do not whine and complain because you cannot have it both ways. You cannot smoke without consequences. If you do not stop, you will die smoking. There is always a price to pay. You can succumb to your desire to get temporary relief from stress or you can work through it for long term happiness, health and freedom. You must choose between temporary discomfort and ongoing misery.
Use these steps to face your compulsion to smoke and train your mind to work in a new way, instead of automatically giving in to your desire, like Pavlov’s dog.
Breaking your connection to cigarettes takes time and it is easy to become discouraged, so focus on what you are trying to accomplish such as good health, peace of mind, self-respect and freedom from fear and slavery. You are doing something wonderful for yourself and when you succeed, you will be grateful for the rest of your life.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Romancing the Cigarette After You Have Quit Smoking
Have you ever been in a bad relationship and had it break up? There were so many things that you didn't like about the person you were involved with. But after six months, you haven't started dating anyone else and your thoughts drift back to the fond memories, you tell yourself it wasn't so bad, you had some great times together, you forget all the negative qualities and before you know it, you're on the phone setting up a reunion. Across the table at dinner, you're wondering, "What was I thinking, this person is such a jerk! NOW I remember why it didn't work out!" and you can't wait for dinner to be over and never see this person again.
We do the same thing with cigarettes after we have quit. The break up was horrible, and miserable, there are soooo many things that we didn't like about smoking but after a period of time we start reminiscing about the things that we did like about smoking and our minds leads us back into having just one and before you know it, you're at the store buying a pack or bumming one from a friend. But unlike the past boyfriend or girlfriend that is easy to drop again, cigarettes are like a stalker relationship, they dig their claws into you again and don't let go and the struggle to quit continues again. But instead of placing the blame where it belongs--with nicotine and it's seductive addicting qualities, we blame ourselves. It's time to get mad not at ourselves but to what keeps us enslaved and to put our energy to getting nicotine, like a bad relationship, out of our lives for good!
We do the same thing with cigarettes after we have quit. The break up was horrible, and miserable, there are soooo many things that we didn't like about smoking but after a period of time we start reminiscing about the things that we did like about smoking and our minds leads us back into having just one and before you know it, you're at the store buying a pack or bumming one from a friend. But unlike the past boyfriend or girlfriend that is easy to drop again, cigarettes are like a stalker relationship, they dig their claws into you again and don't let go and the struggle to quit continues again. But instead of placing the blame where it belongs--with nicotine and it's seductive addicting qualities, we blame ourselves. It's time to get mad not at ourselves but to what keeps us enslaved and to put our energy to getting nicotine, like a bad relationship, out of our lives for good!
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Weight Gain Tied to Emotional Issues when Quitting Smoking
Many people will gain weight when they quit smoking (see previous blog for 7 Reasons Why Quitters gain weight on August 1, 2008). The reason why people will gain a large amount of weight is because they are eating more, it is not because of the small change in metabolism. Why the increase in food? For emotional reasons. We smoke when we are sad, happy, lonely, afraid, angry, stressed and for many other emotions because smoking enhances our emotional state. It enhances positive emotions and lessens negative emotions, we can either stop from feeling bad or feel a little bit better. when we stop smoking, strong emotions tend to overwhelm the quitter and we reach for food--comfort food, we eat when we are sad, happy, lonely, afraid, angry, stressed and for many other emotions because eating enhances our emotional state. sound familiar? quitters will often replace food as a source of comfort just like they had been using their cigarettes. With each emotion is an emotional need that needs to be addressed instead of covering it up with a substance. Learning how to handle our emotions is just another step to successful living smoke free
Monday, August 4, 2008
Dealing with Stress and Strong Emotions When Quitting Smoking
Smoking offers the illusion of going through life with the least amount of pain and the greatest amount of pleasure. Smoking seems to lessen negative emotions and heightens positive experiences. So when a smoker quits, negative emotions seem to be worse and positive emotions, not quite as fun.
Quitting smoking is like losing a best friend. In the past when experiencing stress or emotional turmoil, a smoker usually reaches for a cigarette for a calming effect. A cigarette helps relieve sadness or the blues. When happy a cigarette helps celebrate the moment. The cigarette has been there through everything. It never talks back, never fails to comfort, and always provides pleasure and gratification. Who wouldn't want a friend like that? Who wouldn't grieve the loss of this friend or experience depression, anxiety or even hostility when that friend is taken away?
Smokers associate strong emotions with smoking. Without the cigarette smokers often don't know how to cope with strong emotions when quitting. They also may experience more negative emotions when quitting, so it is a two edged sword. They don’t have the one coping mechanism that has worked in the past and can relapse when experiencing strong emotions.
Smokers think the answer to this dilemma is to have "just one" cigarette but that will trigger off a relapse because the smoker underestimates the power nicotine has over their brain. Instead, the first question should be-"What is it that I really need?" The answer is not a cigarette. Emotions affect us physically and mentally. Does your body need attention--to vent with exercise or to relax with a bubble bath or a massage? Do you need to emotionally vent by talking to a supportive person or to chill with relaxing music or take your mind off of whats bothering you and go see a movie? The answer to the question, "What is it that I really need?" will be what has been missing in the smokers life that he or she replaced with a cigarette and the answer will be different for each smoker and will vary depending on the circumstances.
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Shame and Guilt when Quitting Smoking
It takes most smokers several quit attempts before they are finally successful at becoming smoke free. The first time, quitters usually get cocky and can't believe how easy it was to quit and they believe that they can smoke when they want, they think they can control their smoking but the changes in the structures of the brain are so strong that a momentary slip can lead to a full relapse. Often when the attempts doesn't work, the relapser can feel a range of emotions from guilt, shame or embarrassment. When we are in embarrassed, we try to not commit the same mistake again or at least not when someone else is watching which can lead to becoming a closet smoker. Both guilt and shame imply failure but for different reasons. Guilt will often prod an individual into taking action because the belief is that we have done something wrong and we naturally want to do what is right but it is our behavior that we judge not ourselves. However, many smokers get caught up in Shame--believing that there is something wrong with them and that is why they can't quit. Shame causes a person to judge themselves as "bad" "defective" or some other terms that condemns the person instead of the behavior. Non-smokers will also invoke shaming by the comments that they make to a smoker. We need to stop judging the person and look at the behavior--that is what we don't like--love the smoker, hate the smoking. Make sure that your smoker realizes the different. Shaming, blaming, and nagging jsut keep the smoker wrapped up with their cigarettes and inhibits the progress eneded to move forward to quit.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Quitting Smoking is Not a One Time Event
Every smoker has heard from friends and family, "I don't know why you just don't put that cigarette down and walk away?" What these well meaning people believe is that quitting is a one time event but it's not, it's a process that a smoker moves through. It's like going on a diet. If a person needed to lose 50 pounds, no one would say, "I don't know why you just don't drop those 50 pounds right now?" Everyone understands that to lose 50 pounds will take some time and work but we expect smokers to quit without any time or work. But quitting smoking is different than a diet in another way too. After someone loses 50 pounds, they need to stay in a maintenance mode to maintain the weight loss. If they go back to their same habits, the weight will slowly crept back up over time. If a smoker relapses back to smoking, it's like gaining those 50 pounds back all at one time. Just like a dieter needs to find a plan that works for them, change some behaviors, change attitudes and beliefs towards food, confront emotional eating and stress, a smoker needs to do the same thing as well deal with the physical withdrawals and recovery symptoms.
The Public Health Department has established guideline for physicians which calls for looking at smoking as a chronic condition. Obesity is a chronic condition too and when dieters we congratulate every pound lost and every behavior change, with smokers we expect reaching the goal immediately instead of looking for progress. Instead of pushing a smoker beyond where they can cope, a better strategy is to look for what the smoker IS willing to. It maybe it is agreeing to only smoke outside, stop smoking in the car, to start walking after dinner instead of smoking. Find a small agreement that the smoker is willing to keep and build on it.
The Public Health Department has established guideline for physicians which calls for looking at smoking as a chronic condition. Obesity is a chronic condition too and when dieters we congratulate every pound lost and every behavior change, with smokers we expect reaching the goal immediately instead of looking for progress. Instead of pushing a smoker beyond where they can cope, a better strategy is to look for what the smoker IS willing to. It maybe it is agreeing to only smoke outside, stop smoking in the car, to start walking after dinner instead of smoking. Find a small agreement that the smoker is willing to keep and build on it.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Why Smokers Gain Weight When They Quit Smoking and Tips to Quit
there are 7 different reasons why smokers gain weight when they quit, most of it is because of eating more food:
1. Change in metabolism accounts for 3-6 pounds. 70% of weight gain is due to increase calorie consumption.
- Exercise, 20 minutes per day more than you normally do
- Discuss using Zyban™ and Nicotine Replacement Products with your doctor, these medications can help reduce the amount of weight gained.
2. Withdrawal from nicotine causes low blood sugar
- Substitute raw fruit or vegetables for pastries, candy bars and junk food
- Eat on a regular basis, do not skip meals
3. Ingesting more food as a habit of hand to mouth motion
- Stock up on low fat crunchy foods, such as unshelled unsalted sunflower seeds, or unbuttered popcorn, eat one at a time.
- Increase intake of vegetables such as carrot sticks, celery, green peppers, jicama,
- Get a fake cigarette, a coffee stirrer or toothpick to chew on
- Get a water bottle and take frequent sips of water
4. Using food as a reward for not smoking
- Find other rewards than food, treat yourself with the money you are saving by not smoking
- Stay conscious about the amount of food that you are eating
- Keep a food diary, writing down before you eat what you are going to eat, where you are, what
you are doing and how you are feeling.
5. Eating more at meals to delay having a craving that comes at the end of a meal
- Get up from the table as soon as you are full
- Go brush your teeth, have a breathe mint, chew gum
- Use a smaller plate
- Go for a walk after eating
6. Food tastes and smells better once you have quit smoking
- Eat slower, putting your fork down in between bites
- Decide and write it down, how much food that you are going to eat before the meal
- Be conscious of what you are putting into your mouth
7. Emotional eating. Not dealing with feelings and emotions but using food as a substitute for
emotional needs. To escape from boredom, tension, depression. Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired
- Continue the food diary, paying particular attention to how you are feeling when you are eating. Decide how to handle emotions in a health, non-judgment manner without resorting to food, alcohol, cigarettes or other substances.
1. Change in metabolism accounts for 3-6 pounds. 70% of weight gain is due to increase calorie consumption.
- Exercise, 20 minutes per day more than you normally do
- Discuss using Zyban™ and Nicotine Replacement Products with your doctor, these medications can help reduce the amount of weight gained.
2. Withdrawal from nicotine causes low blood sugar
- Substitute raw fruit or vegetables for pastries, candy bars and junk food
- Eat on a regular basis, do not skip meals
3. Ingesting more food as a habit of hand to mouth motion
- Stock up on low fat crunchy foods, such as unshelled unsalted sunflower seeds, or unbuttered popcorn, eat one at a time.
- Increase intake of vegetables such as carrot sticks, celery, green peppers, jicama,
- Get a fake cigarette, a coffee stirrer or toothpick to chew on
- Get a water bottle and take frequent sips of water
4. Using food as a reward for not smoking
- Find other rewards than food, treat yourself with the money you are saving by not smoking
- Stay conscious about the amount of food that you are eating
- Keep a food diary, writing down before you eat what you are going to eat, where you are, what
you are doing and how you are feeling.
5. Eating more at meals to delay having a craving that comes at the end of a meal
- Get up from the table as soon as you are full
- Go brush your teeth, have a breathe mint, chew gum
- Use a smaller plate
- Go for a walk after eating
6. Food tastes and smells better once you have quit smoking
- Eat slower, putting your fork down in between bites
- Decide and write it down, how much food that you are going to eat before the meal
- Be conscious of what you are putting into your mouth
7. Emotional eating. Not dealing with feelings and emotions but using food as a substitute for
emotional needs. To escape from boredom, tension, depression. Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired
- Continue the food diary, paying particular attention to how you are feeling when you are eating. Decide how to handle emotions in a health, non-judgment manner without resorting to food, alcohol, cigarettes or other substances.
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