Shame and Guilt when Quitting Smoking

It takes most smokers several quit attempts before they are finally successful at becoming smoke free. The first time, quitters usually get cocky and can't believe how easy it was to quit and they believe that they can smoke when they want, they think they can control their smoking but the changes in the structures of the brain are so strong that a momentary slip can lead to a full relapse. Often when the attempts doesn't work, the relapser can feel a range of emotions from guilt, shame or embarrassment. When we are in embarrassed, we try to not commit the same mistake again or at least not when someone else is watching which can lead to becoming a closet smoker. Both guilt and shame imply failure but for different reasons. Guilt will often prod an individual into taking action because the belief is that we have done something wrong and we naturally want to do what is right but it is our behavior that we judge not ourselves. However, many smokers get caught up in Shame--believing that there is something wrong with them and that is why they can't quit. Shame causes a person to judge themselves as "bad" "defective" or some other terms that condemns the person instead of the behavior. Non-smokers will also invoke shaming by the comments that they make to a smoker. We need to stop judging the person and look at the behavior--that is what we don't like--love the smoker, hate the smoking. Make sure that your smoker realizes the different. Shaming, blaming, and nagging jsut keep the smoker wrapped up with their cigarettes and inhibits the progress eneded to move forward to quit.

Quitting Smoking is Not a One Time Event

Every smoker has heard from friends and family, "I don't know why you just don't put that cigarette down and walk away?" What these well meaning people believe is that quitting is a one time event but it's not, it's a process that a smoker moves through. It's like going on a diet. If a person needed to lose 50 pounds, no one would say, "I don't know why you just don't drop those 50 pounds right now?" Everyone understands that to lose 50 pounds will take some time and work but we expect smokers to quit without any time or work. But quitting smoking is different than a diet in another way too. After someone loses 50 pounds, they need to stay in a maintenance mode to maintain the weight loss. If they go back to their same habits, the weight will slowly crept back up over time. If a smoker relapses back to smoking, it's like gaining those 50 pounds back all at one time. Just like a dieter needs to find a plan that works for them, change some behaviors, change attitudes and beliefs towards food, confront emotional eating and stress, a smoker needs to do the same thing as well deal with the physical withdrawals and recovery symptoms.
The Public Health Department has established guideline for physicians which calls for looking at smoking as a chronic condition. Obesity is a chronic condition too and when dieters we congratulate every pound lost and every behavior change, with smokers we expect reaching the goal immediately instead of looking for progress. Instead of pushing a smoker beyond where they can cope, a better strategy is to look for what the smoker IS willing to. It maybe it is agreeing to only smoke outside, stop smoking in the car, to start walking after dinner instead of smoking. Find a small agreement that the smoker is willing to keep and build on it.

Why Smokers Gain Weight When They Quit Smoking and Tips to Quit

there are 7 different reasons why smokers gain weight when they quit, most of it is because of eating more food:

1. Change in metabolism accounts for 3-6 pounds. 70% of weight gain is due to increase calorie consumption.
- Exercise, 20 minutes per day more than you normally do
- Discuss using Zyban™ and Nicotine Replacement Products with your doctor, these medications can help reduce the amount of weight gained.

2. Withdrawal from nicotine causes low blood sugar
- Substitute raw fruit or vegetables for pastries, candy bars and junk food
- Eat on a regular basis, do not skip meals

3. Ingesting more food as a habit of hand to mouth motion
- Stock up on low fat crunchy foods, such as unshelled unsalted sunflower seeds, or unbuttered popcorn, eat one at a time.
- Increase intake of vegetables such as carrot sticks, celery, green peppers, jicama,
- Get a fake cigarette, a coffee stirrer or toothpick to chew on
- Get a water bottle and take frequent sips of water


4. Using food as a reward for not smoking
- Find other rewards than food, treat yourself with the money you are saving by not smoking
- Stay conscious about the amount of food that you are eating
- Keep a food diary, writing down before you eat what you are going to eat, where you are, what
you are doing and how you are feeling.

5. Eating more at meals to delay having a craving that comes at the end of a meal
- Get up from the table as soon as you are full
- Go brush your teeth, have a breathe mint, chew gum
- Use a smaller plate
- Go for a walk after eating

6. Food tastes and smells better once you have quit smoking
- Eat slower, putting your fork down in between bites
- Decide and write it down, how much food that you are going to eat before the meal
- Be conscious of what you are putting into your mouth

7. Emotional eating. Not dealing with feelings and emotions but using food as a substitute for
emotional needs. To escape from boredom, tension, depression. Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired
- Continue the food diary, paying particular attention to how you are feeling when you are eating. Decide how to handle emotions in a health, non-judgment manner without resorting to food, alcohol, cigarettes or other substances.